


Of Doritos and Potatoes

by orphan_account



Category: Pocket Monsters: Sword & Shield | Pokemon Sword & Shield Versions
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character building, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Humor, Light Angst, Prompt Fic, Self-Indulgent, Some Plot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:34:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27045817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: A couple of dorks daily life and misadventures sharing a life togetherA prompt fic
Relationships: Dande | Leon/Original Character(s)
Kudos: 1





	Of Doritos and Potatoes

**Author's Note:**

> First chapter is kinda gross- but in a funny way
> 
> __________ separates the prompts

"Yeah this bad boy's clogged up good n tight." Leon flinched at the wording, something about the combination of words into one sentence didn't sit well with him. 

The plumber, their usual, pulled himself up from the floor and dusted his wrinkled hands from the supposed grime. "I'll be back tomorrow with the right tools, ya got me last minute champ.." He chuckled, sounding too much like a grandfather for Leon's liking as he patted him on the shoulder. 

"Thanks for stopping by anyhow Mr. Jameson, I know you don't like being bothered on Sundays like this. I tried to unclog it myself but it just..got worse." Leon explained, crossing his arms and huffing in mild exasperation. 

"It's quite alright lad, accidents happen..uh..I take it the lil lady is uh..quite embarrassed, no?" He shook his head as Leon threw a thumb over his shoulder pointing to the bedroom. "Well, tell her it was nice to see her anyhow..oh and...maybe to lay off the snack foods, dunno if the poor loo can handle much more." He chuckled as Leon sputtered and walked to the front door to see himself out.

After the elderly plumber was gone Leon made his way to the master bedroom and peeked his head inside. There, his girlfriend was laying with her back to the door and an almost tangible dark cloud looming overhead. He sighed and stepped into the room and patted her shoulder. 

"Come on Dan, it wasn't that bad...like Mr. Jameson always says- accidents happen! Cheer up, look why don't we go to that place you like a couple blocks from here?" He tried his darndest but the smaller didn't budge or speak. He poked his lip out and sighed as he maneuvered her to face him.

He snorted, a real ugly one too, he shouldn't have laughed but the expression she was making was too cute. "I dun wanna..stop staring!" She bit back, almost swiping at him lazily like a cat of some sort. 

Leon only leaned back a slight bit in response and moved over onto the bed. "No, I don't want you here right now can't you see how embarrassed I am!" She really did look like one of those sad cat memes and it took everything Leon had to not burst into a fit of giggles. Dan finally, grumpily, sat up on her Elbows. 

Her brows were furrowed and her features scrunched up almost like the knots of a tree trunk. 

"Not only did my boyfriend have to try and unclog the damn toilet with my....feces in it, we had to call the plumber! You know how James is, he's gonna be laughing with my mom for WEEKS about this!" Leon could swear her eyes doubled in size when they became wet with tears.

"Babe, it's not like it's the first time I've see-" 

"STOP-"

"Your shit."

"LEON."

"We're both adults here Dan, i'm not gonna be grossed out by a clogged toilet...ok maybe a little bit." To that Dan flopped onto her side and became a bread loaf of disappointment and sadness. "What are you doing." "I'm loafing." "Loafing.." "Loafing." "Guess you wouldn't mind if I took a bite then..?" 

Before the brunette could answer Leon made a comical chomping sound as he gently bit into his lover's plump arm. Dan jumped at the sudden action and shot him a dirty look, but she couldn't deny that it was pretty funny. She whined, "Oh no, please don't eat me- a poor bread loaf!" 

Leon snickered and sat up, "I've heard your pleas and have decided to spare you..on one condition." She looked up at him with mock wonder and spoke, "What would that be?" He smirked, "That you stop moping over dumb stuff." Dan pouted again but finally sat up and moved to the edge of the bed. "Ok ok, fine...i'm just glad we have two bathrooms." 

"Right? I'd hate to have to check into a hotel or something..but look at it this way- Your furfrou will never drink from the toilet again-"

"LEON!" "He's traumatized Dan- the poor lad." "I'M DUMPING YOU-" "If it's anything like what's in the toilet then-"

"UGGHHH!!" She ran out of the room, hands covering her face and out the front door into the patio area. "Hehehe, well at least she's out of the house.." He stood up, stretched and followed after her.

______________________

"So..this was your plan all along?" Dan looked up at the purplette, a cheshire's grin on her face. "Yup. What do you think?" She asked, making jazz hands at the cake on the table. "I think you made me look like a dorito chip..do I really look like that?" Dan pouted and playfully elbowed him in the stomach. "Hey, I did my best..drawing with cake frosting isn't as easy as it is with my tablet pen. I think it looks pretty good myself~!" She chimed looking rather proud of her endeavor. 

Leon chuckled and pushed her hair back a bit to kiss her rather large forehead. "It looks tasty, let's dig i-"

"WAIT-"

"Wait?"

"I need to take pictures, Raihan wants to see my masterpiece." She pulled her rotom phone from her pocket. "Hey Rotom, snapshot mode." "Bzzt! Aye!"

Leon shook his head and just plopped down at the kitchen Island to wait for his lover to finish her little photoshoot. Which happened to be about several minutes since 'lighting' and such was a factor. Was that a ring light...? When did she get a-.

"Okaay- I think you've taken enough photos..the cake will spoil by the time you're finished with your glamor shots.." Dan stuck her tongue out as she slid her phone back into her pocket. "Ok fine, let's eat then mr.Dorito man."

The champion rolled his eyes as he moved over to the other side of the island and took a seat next to the dark skinned woman. Dan sliced the first piece and sat it aside for Leon before getting one for herself. This was a mistake, the moment she looked back his piece was missing and he was now cleaning the fork free of residue. She would have gasped if this wasn't a common occurrence in their household. 

"Arceus, Lee did you think a meowth was going to swipe it before you could get a crumb??" She joked. It was Leon's turn to stick his tongue out. "Ew you dork, go brush your teeth or something." He leaned over and bit her cheek instead, she squeaked and attempted to poke him with her fork before he dodged and shuffled out of the room "Hmph! You gotta run off those calories anyhow champ!" She called after him, shaking her small fist in mock anger.

Before she could take a bite there was a distant retort, "I'm taking you with me!" At that, she just slumped in her seat. "Shit..." 

A couple feet away Charizard exhaled from his nose in her direction. "You can shut up too.." The gremlin stuck a fork into her cake and took a bite.

**Author's Note:**

> :D


End file.
